Men -- What we can learn from them.

In a previous post discussing spouses, I mentioned a description by a friend as men being "primitive."  I want to elaborate on why I thought that was such a keen observation. 

Men are straightforward in their communication, both verbal and nonverbal.  Most say what they want and express their feelings using simple and clear language.  We women could learn a thing or two from this. 

How many times have you been angry at your significant other?  How do you communicate this to him?  Do you sigh?  Slam pots and pans around?  Give short "yes" and "no" answers to his questions?  And when he asks "What's wrong?" do your respond "Nothing" and when he carries on with his business do you get even angrier because he doesn't know you are angry?! 

Come on ladies, we've all done it.  The big question here is why?  Are we trying to to shift the balance of power our way by sending doing these covert maneuvers and then launching a surprise attack, e.g., "How could you not know that I am angry at you!"   

How often has your significant other used this tactic on you?  If he has, how did it make you feel?  I would feel blindsided, flustered and retreat away from the source of the assault.  This is not a communication pattern that lends itself to a happy relationship.

Thus, the point of this discussion:  Women could learn a lot from the way men communicate.  The old adage "keep it simple stupid" is true.  If you are angry with your spouse, tell him.  If you would like him do something, ask him.  If you want open communication with your partner, be more honest in your communication style.

We'll talk more about what we can learn from men and how they communicate with their children next time.  Until then, I would love to hear your thoughts on this topic.  Have you tried any of these tactics?  I would love to hear from anybody who has found success with this...

Comments

[Mommy off the Record]

I agree that being straightforward with your feelings is often a good approach. I try to tell my husband exactly how I'm feeling as soon as I feel it so that he knows and I don't start feeling like I'm harboring resentment. It usually works unless he just tunes me out, which is fairly often the case. LOL

(P.S. Thanks for visiting my blog the other day! Nice to meet ya!)

[Jill Urbane, The Mentor Mom]

Wonderful to hear that you are able to be upfront with your husband and also that it usually works out! They do have a tendency to tune us out don't they? But I must admit, I am guilty of the same at times...