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i really appreciate this article/post. my son has been diagnosed with bi-polar disorder, ADHD and oppositional defiance disorder. just getting him to tie his shoes (which he just learned to do at 10) is WAR. i'm terribly depressed most of the time, because i just want him to stop. stop screaming, stop arguing, stop fighting, stop stop stop. i can't stand being around him. he screams he hates me, and choice other statements. he's been hospitalized 15 times since he was 5, and i am trying soooo hard to keep from having to send him back. thank you for showing me that even parents of average, every day kids can get so frustrated they can't stand to be around them. i really appreciate it.


This post is spot-on for me. My son is 4 years old and my daugher 1. He is such a difficult child and I am constantly arguing with him. I feel guilty because I often "lose it" with him. He has such great qualities but when he gets around my daughter he loses his head. He has a surge of emotions that he can't control. I get so angry with his actions because I am trying to protect my little girl. She incidentally is also very laid back and I am crazy about her.

Everyone says to spend one-on-one time with him and I do but as soon as we get back near his sister he acts up again.

I know that his behavior many times is driven by my reactions. It is true that you need to be in control of your emotions first and foremost. This is quite a challenge when they know exactly which buttons to press.

mary jane

I too am going through an episode of not wanting to be around my son. My son is five and needs to be in control of everything. I live with my boyfriend who has a 4 1/2 year old son,he is constantly bullying and bossing him around. If he doesn't do what my son wants he hits him and says very mean things. Not only that but my son has so much energy and is on 10 every second he is awake. I work full time and feel like I'm always going. I try different methods and it works for a short time, then he back to being a fresh little boy. I loose it sometimes and feel so guilty. I feel I'm doing the best I can. I give him so much love and attention. Why is my little boy so angry? I hope its just a phase. It feels good to know other mothers cant stand their kids too!!


This hit the spot...and thankyou God that their is such a site and I am not the only one thinking "How can I not stand my own child, my fleshing blood?" My son is almost 5 and this started about 4 1/2. We are still working on this and I hope it is just a phase. He has a sister 6months, and he adores her and is really good with her, so that is a plus and gives me hope, that this is just the age group.

vanessa v

I've read everyone's post and I hear the boys being handfuls but for us it's my girl! She is 4 1/2 (as most of your were at the time of your issues). I have a 14 year old boy who is an angel. She is constantly fighting with him and calling him names. Yesterday we went shopping as a family. She asked for a drink and when i said no, she slammed the door of the coke frig door. Then she said she wanted a toy as we were leaving the store and when we said we weren't going to buy it she threw it across the store! She is a handful but i am starting to think it's the age. ANd the tips were super helpful!! Thank you!!

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